New Poll Question

THOD has certainly caught Phillies Phever, have you? Vote in the newest poll by clicking here (it will be in the top right of that page, as always).

Please note: results of the last poll have been suppressed due to voting improprities bya group of rogue delegates. Have your voice heard by voting in the new poll -- click here now. You're opportunity is fleeting.

Fightins!

Does this blog and this contributor have a Phillies slant?





You Betcha!




Hey #5 - Feelin You!!

Let's go Killer K tonight...





Meanwhile... there is still plenty of work to be done....

Harry Hairston Reporting

Can't find the time to hit the links and still make it to the strip club? No problem, just head to the Grrrrrreat Northeast.

Now on 10: after some tremendous tongue-in-cheek comments from Tim Lake, Harry takes over with the type of hard-hitting jornalism synonymous with NBC10 News:

"It's like the beach meets the golf course."

And next on 10: Where Are They Now, Heuis Dad edition

Clean Slide?

I was lucky enough to be down at the ballpark last night for the local 9's 3 straight victory over the hated Met.

If you watched the game, you know how it ended... Dumbass and former Phil Marlon Anderson sliding 5 feet off the bag in an attempt to break-up a double-play. Our boy on the scene and the most fit umpire in baseball C.B. Buckner said notsomuch.

Clean Slide? Not this time.

It was after this moment that I stood back in my standing room only seat behind home plate and watched what defines every single garbage Met fan out there.... CRYING.

"But he's allowed to do that," one met turd clad in blue and orange pined, "he can't throw him out!"

Yes he can, and yes he did.

The CRYING only validated my hatred for the Met fan and why they've lived the life that they do, and why there is no other choice for them to cry.

For example all Met fans:

Have scarring, disgusting facial features including zit beards and acne

Have more hair on their back than on their head

Write their names in their underwear

Eat their boogies.

I guess after realizing that, I get it. They're born with it. Fromthe time they come out of the womb, they're just ugly, disgusting people. I found this picture online of this slappy, who claims to be the biggest Met fan on the face of the earth.

If I was a Met fan I'd wake-up every morning and CRY too.

Phils sweep that Mets today beginning at 1:05pm.

Nobody Circles the Wagons Like the Philadelphia Phillies

And, this is how you walk off against the Mets:
























*Photo stolen from dannigirl027's tremendous photstream on flickr.

What is this crap?

From the writer of the newly-crowned "Best Article on THOD" (Amanda Kane, Public House, August 26, 2007)...

What is this garbage that is being passed as legitimate entries? Look at the last few posts by the Hick. WTF? This is what we are forced to read/listen to when we log onto THOD?

I demand standards... We all deserve more than a simple link to Youtube of a sound-clip that was first heard on Tony Bruno. I like America's Show as much as anyone. But I would ask, nay, demand, that all quasi-pseudo contributors to THOD take more time and put more thought into what has become daily readings of thousands of loyal readers.

Thank you.

The Big Lie

Interested in what that lie is?

Click on http://happiestofdays.blogspot.com/



http://

Cole Compress

What Now Cole's hurt? What he do, hurt his fancy face with too much blush?



Not, that Cole - this one.



What to do?



Please note that video clips such as the outstanding one included in this blog cannot be viewed in your email. To view this and Sut's drunken rant yesterday, log onto http://www.happiestofdays.blogspot.com/

Not too Busy Man, Not too Busy...

http://


Please devote 3 minutes of your time to listen to this clip. Its one of the best drunk conversations ever had or heard live on air.

If you ever watch ESPN and Rick Sutcliffe, or listen to Tony Bruno you'll love it even more.

Here's the transcript:
Sut: How good is this?
Mud: What's up, Redhead?
Matt: You taking some time away from your busy ESPN world to hang out down here with us little dogs?
Sut: It's not that busy, man. It's not that busy?
Matt: Sut, who you been playing golf with?
Sut: He's here. He's in the house tonight. Bill Murray.
Matt: What's the best city in the National League to play golf in, seriously?
Sut: [chuckles] The best city in the world, Mud. Where is it?
Mud: San Diego.
Sut: Right here, man. You can't beat it.
Sut: George Clooney. You been readin' about all that? You been seein' that?



Matt: George Clooney?
Sut: Yeah. He's up there with um... He's up there with the Congress. He's trying to get everybody? to go over there... and solve that thing.
Sut: I'm getting yelled at from Bill Murray in the back. I need to go. I'd much rather hang with you guys than him.


Mud: Thanks for joining us, Sut.
Sut: He can wait.
Sut: Mud, you're the best, man. Anybody on Earth that doesn't like Mark Grant? They got... They got problems. Matty! What're you still doing here in San Diego?
Matt: [interrupting] Red Baron, you were... Hey, by the way, you were...
Sut: [cross-talk] Matty!
Matt: ...the answer to a trivia question earlier.Sut: No-no-no, Matty.Matt: We were... We were at Dodgers Stadium?
Sut: Everybody on Earth has been trying to steal you.
Matt: We were at Dodgers Stadium?
Sut: The Dodgers, the Cubs. ESPN.
Matt: Two weeks ago?
Sut: What're you still doing here?

Axed!

Out with the Cookie and In with the Candy...

Could it Be?



Can it Be?



It Is!



Cookie now = Candy. May the legend live on.

Outraged...but why?

Every year, certain themes seem to emerge as the primary focus of our Avalon houses. Theses of past summers include consistent power hours and game playing as in the Taj, the intense practical joking by Micah in Nipsy, or the incredible drug use by RickEEE. Regardless of the year, house inhabitants always knew what to expect from Friday to Sunday. This year is no exception. This year, when people arrive on South 6th Street, everyone can expect to experience some sort of unusual, unnecessary, dramatic event. Like the gunman of Philadelphia, the histrionics can erupt at any time, with no apparent motive, pattern or rational.

I would like to formally retract all of my statements from early Sunday morning. Please allow me to address them in order:

To Paul, Amanda, Kelli and Ryan, please accept my apologies for waking you up and listening to my thoughts. Not since Mel Gibson’s attack on our Jewish brothers has such an unwarranted attack been the result of a night of drinking. Mel was wrong. And so was my telling Kelli that she isn’t that terrible. Thanks must go out, however, to Chris and Fitz. Without your constant support to my cause, the episode would probably have lasted 30 seconds, instead of fifteen minutes.

Secondly, as if they don’t have it rough enough already, my heart goes out to all the hobos that spend time at the Jersey shore. All they want is a dry bed and a hot shower. I can’t imagine how many more hobos hoped to take a break from the hustle and bustle of begging for spare change in front of Wawa and watching my car when I park in front of their air vent, only to find their reservations had been cancelled during my night of passion. There will always be room for our smelly friends. (Hobos: Upon arrival, please look for the Phillies blanket and Barney sheets and take a load off.)


Finally, and what I feel worst about, is my attack on shut-ins. They have done nothing but build this country from the ground up, fight ours wars, and sire our families. Although their mobility may not be what it once was, that does not mean they should not be able to enjoy all Avalon has to offer. My yelling at the sky degrading all shut-ins was unnecessary, and quite frankly un-American. So to all the silver-foxes that were hoping to spend some time at the Welcome Center, please accept this invitation.


There are bigger issues, however. What prompted this most recent outburst? Who is to blame? Will these outbursts continue? These are these questions that we will all have to work together to comprehend. The coming days, months, and years will be very important to understand these, and other pressing issues of the house. Until that day is upon us, let us all toast the mysteries of the glorious shore weekends.

Out There!

Be sure to take a look at the World Class Wedding and Weekend Below!

A Lttle Bit Mo!

Last night's win was tremendous. There is nothing better than sending the old crotchedy Coxie back to Atlanta eating a shit sandwich.



If you missed the broadcast is was nothing short of spectacular including a very awkward interview with Chase Utley as well as an overly outstanding celebration by the Six Finger, Antonio Alfonseca. If anyone can find a picture of that Dominican dance please submit ASAP.

What was also very insightful was when Jon Miller and Joe Morgan were going on about where they were when Barry Bonds broke the record last week. Miller, not surprisingly since he is the TV voice of the Giants was in the ballpark.

Morgan on the other hand gave a very interesting response that painted a picture that was even more interesting.

Here said that he was watching the game in his WHIRLPOOL when Barry went yard to overtake Hank Aaron.

If that wasn't strange enough, he also mentioned that he STOOD UP to clap for young Barroid.

I don't know about you but the visuals that first came to mind went something like this:

In other news....

Please stay tuned to THOD this week for an exclusive recap on the Lutz wedding including the Best Surprises and Biggest Disappointments...

More to Come! -That's what she said.

World Famous Wedding & Weekend

After such a banner weekend turned last weekend in by the masses, one starts to wonder "Can it Get Any Better?" Well young man that's the thing - it can, can, can! Phils in a virtual tie for the wild card, state football right around the corner, glorious shore weekend upon it. Absolutely Lovin It!

But first....Let's do some highlighting and reflection regrading the weekend formerly known as August 10-12th.

Saturday night - Lutz wedding which was nothing short of spectacular. Here's some power rankings from what turned out the be the swaree of the summer.

Best Performances:

1) The World Famous Hotel Dupont: Seriously could it be any nicer? The food, the breakfast, the everything. It is my recommendation that robes be worn any and everyplace possible. In fact, I'm wearing one right now - sans underpants - as I type away in the Bucks County Coffee Shop in the yunk. Lovin every minute of it!

2) Easton's own Greg P.: The worm followed by a turtle spin and an elbow twist - TWICE. Can't wait to see it on video. What was even better was Greg persistently asking me throughout the remainder of the night about his dance move - "Buddy, did it look professional?"

3) The Band: I don't know their name, but I don't have too. I know what they should change their name to - TITS. With the exception of "Brickhouse," they did a phenomenal job that will be remembered forever, for ever, ever. I could listen to that guy sing Prince all day long. Tremendous horns only made them that much more TITS.

4) Matt Bandateless: Jimmy Berlutti never left the dance floor and either did his wingtips. Milli-Vinilli flashbacks were abundant, and Datels proved why we can tolerate his being a Met Fan. Matt - you're welcome in the Delaware Valley anytime and congratulations to you and the "Adventures of New Christine" sharing a place in Soho.

Biggest Disappointments:

1) Coog Hogland: Whaaaaaaaaaaa Happpppppppppenddddddddddddd? Is it just me or was the big guy just a shell of himself on Saturday? Besides BLOWING HIS WAD on the first fast song of the night with his Jamie Moyer-esque sprint to the dance floor Ace Smallcock was no where to be found. Did he take one?

2) DJ Stupid (Greg): A no-show for the gala of '07 was a huge let-down. Who cares if you booked Harvey Goldensteinburg's bat-mitzfah 6 months ago in Jenkintown? Odds are they would have found someone else to to juice those jerks up to "Mr. Wendell, Kriss Kross, and Iesha" Odds that you may have introduced them wrong?........ Even better.

Just kidding Greg - but you missed a good time.

3) Wilmington: No wonder nobody lives there. That town makes Pottsville look like South Beach. Woof!

4) Rake Sheth: Okay, maybe he was a little occupied. But in typical Rake fashion he was just that - THE RAKE.

That's What the Weekly Poll Said

In an overwhelming victory, "That's What She Said" is clearly the happiest of summer sayings. It's a fact. You can look it up. Or look at this video (click to enjoy):

Hey, Rake!

With so many folks wishing you well on this day of days, here's a friendly message from yourself: