Throw Some Ds On That...

This past Memorial Day weekend I was in South Beach Miami and encountered the 2007 Source Hip Hop Awards. The event honors not only artists of Hip Hop but also many aspects of its culture. The Miami Herald reports that since the start of the event in 2001 there have been many police problems with the estimated 200,000+ visitors resulting in around 1,000+ arrests at past events. Upon visiting over two days, its seemed to me that the event has become quite well organized and peaceful for the most part.

10 Favorite Things To Do At Source Hip Hops Awards:

1. Dubs, dubs, and more DUBS!!
2. Videotape women at close range with or without consent
3. Watch porn on the multiple dvd screens in your car while parked
4. Bass (no treble)
5. Keep It Real
6. Recognize
7. Hold It Down
8. Rep
9. Holler
10. more DUBS!




In closing, artist Rich Boy's song "Throw Some D's" sums up this weekend's events:

Rich Boy Sellin' Crack
Dope N*ggas Wanna Jack Shit
Tight No Slack Just Bought A Cadillac
Throw Some D's On Da Bitch!!
Just Bought A Cadillac
Throw Some D's On Dat Bitch!!
Just Bought A Cadillac
Throw Some D's On Dat Bitch!!

Took It To Da Chop Shop
Got Da Damn Top Dropped
Two Colored Flipped Flopped
Candy Red Lolipop
Deres Some Hoes In Da 'lot
Still Got My Glock Hott
New Money Motha Fucka Don't You See Da Tail Light
Don't You See Da Big Chain Don't
You Da Big Rims Wonda Who Dey Hatin' On
Lately Baby Its Him Candy Paint
Gator Skin Seats Call Me Dun Dee
Up In Yo 'hood Im Da Fucka Dat
You Wanna Be N*ggas Wish Dey Could Feel Da Wood In My H3 Ridin'
Wit No Tint So Motha-Fuckas know Its Me...

Lovin' It!

&

Harry the K: OUT AT HOME PLATE! OUT AT HOME PLATE!

I'm a fan of OUR BOY Dobbsy as much as the next guy, but he really beefed a huge brain fart last night throwing home when he did.




I would have much rathered this guy at first, even if his wife doesn't think he looks digusting anymore.



What was even more unacceptable was the performance of the catcher known as ROD. This guy, much like the name ROD, brings nothing to the table.

He shouldn't catch another game in Phillies pinstripes.


What bothers me more is that he had the audacity to question home plate umpire Tim Timmons after the game for making the absolute right call. I guess it makes sense though, crying like a pussy is about right after being afraid and getting out of the way of a 150 pound guy coming at you when the ROD outweighs him by almost 100 pounds.


Hey ROD....



For a minute it made me wish this fraud was still catching. At least he would have blocked the plate, he physique would have given him no choice.





Oh by the way ROD, you've also likely cost us our closer and now have this to look forward to for a while blowing games in the 9th.




Get ROD out of HOME PLATE!

The Happiest of Quotes...

"Every night, when Cole Hamels kneels beside his bed and says his prayers, he's interrupted by God, who breaks in and thanks himself for creating Cole Hamels,'' Phillies starter Adam Eaton said, with only a trace of a smile.

Hollywood Hamels

Heidi Hamels

Correction

Last week it was reported in another media outlet (email chain) that our favorite left fielder, #5, was sighted enjoying a heater in front of youngsters at a Philies charity event.

Originally this contributor brushed off this presumption as a falsehood, riff-raff, if you will.

Although be it rare that I am proven wrong, if ever, this contributor is now backing off of that statement. All apologies to the young educator that orginally reported this happening as well to the lad who unfortunatlely witnessed the event firsthand.

Pat that Bat and his enjoying of the heater last week in front of pubescents? Fact!

A source very close to THOD has confirmed that said event took place and even overhead Burrell and a concerned parent jawing back and forth over the matter between drags of his now infamous burner.

Our source is reporting that the following conversation took place on that fateful evening.

Parent: Some of these kids look up you as a role model, don't you think it might be wise to do that (the violent sucking down of a heater) in private?

#5: Fuck that. Dontcha know that by growing up here (in Philadelphia) at least half these kids will be eating these things by the time they're 12. Might as well get used to it sooner than later.

Parent: I just think that for the kids, you should put that out.

#5: Put it out? Are you serious? Fuck that. Tell you what - Ruiz's glove is prettier than most of the catcher's mitt faces on those slobs that scream at me out in left field. This town is disgusting, and so are the sluts that wet their pants for me. Look at yourself, you're disgusting too, parent.

Parent: You're an embarrassment.

#5: How old is your daughter?

So here's to your boy celebrating yet another called third strike

with a pack of these strikes

#5!!!!

Happiest of Days to You, Young Fella!

Phils are climbing back, shore in less than a week, can it get any better?

With all this talk about Tony Blair hanging it up, and the Queen meeting the young chappy that won the derby, it makes me wonder aloud...

Why are people so consumed with the Royal Family across the pond when we have our very own King right here in South Philadelphia?

Also, I have an announcement to make, there is more human garbage in our fair city of Philadelphia than anywhere in the world. Have you taken a good look at the clientele down at Citizen's Bank Park lately? That's not even counting this scrap..

or this human garbage

Also, many of you may have noticed that Interleague Play kicked off this week in Major League Baseball. This weekend teams were to supposed to play their alleged "natural" rivals. In some cases it makes sense, (Yankees vs. Mets, Cubs vs. White Sox) but in many cases it does not (Phils vs. Blue Jays, Rockies vs. Royals).

In the spirit of this, THOD has taken it upon itself under the same basic premise to qualify our own natural rivals among our group.

So here goes:

Chris vs. Rich (Aboveworld vs. Underworld, Good vs. Bad, Life vs. Death, Heaven vs. Hell)

Bill vs. Drew (This has been primarily a one-sided rivalry in years past. Now both have huge heavy sides (that's a big fat fucking gut to you and me))

Paul vs. Micah (Catholics vs. Case of the Yips)

Dan vs. Ryan (Dueling banjos)

Goon vs. Goon (He is his own worst enemy)

Wes vs. Seth (they play in the same weight and hair division)

Greg vs. Amish (Part-time rivals or Brothers from Other Mothers?)

Lastly, for those of you who still don't subscribe to satellite radio, check out the old Sunny 104.5 here in Philadelphia. The station is truly tits resembling the Y100 of old and has no commercials. Its also apparently on the web, but I haven't found it just yet.

Put This One in the Win Column

The Pride of St. Joe's Prep... it's Nutter for mayor!

He Crushed It!

44% reporting

Queena Bass and Jesus White have exactly 650 votes, combined. Sure. Why not?

And the current winner, with a 6 point margin over the shark....

Mike Nutter

Mike Nutter

Who the Fuck???

Voted for Milton Street? With 11% percent reporting, he has almost 1,000 votes. He's not even in last place. Seriously? Besides the fact that he's been indicted, and may no have gotten enough signatures to actually run, just look at him:

By the Way...

Who'd you vote for? I, myself, opted for a write-in candidate.

That's right, Dobbsy in '07!

The Big Night

It's finally here! Another Hatfield Dollar Dog Night at the Ballpark... and it's also primary night, ie. the 2007 mayoral decision. Stay tuned to the Happiest of Rarely Read blogs all night for the latest election coverage.

With 1% of precincts reporting, it's Brady in the lead over Knox by 1 point, and YA BOY Mike Nutter trailing Knoxy by 5 points.

Whoops? Too early to tell, let's Jim Gardner and the gang have better news for us at 9pm, or can at least explain this away as nothing to worry about.

As Harry Says...

Chase Utley, You are the man!


Big day tomorrow, could be a lot of shit to spin...

The Year of the Tid????

So many captions, so little time.... (including but not limited to...)





Milky Way
Has Anybody Seen My Lady? (per the song by the Rolling Stones)
Happy Mother's Day!
Booby Trap
Bombs Away!


Photo courtesy of Brown Indian

"It Is What It Is"

You Can Find Me In Da Club vs. You Can Find Me I'm a Schlub

You can find me in da club, bottle full of Bud...



So come give me a hug if you into getting schlubbed..



Go, go, go shorty,
It's your birthday,
We gon' party like
it's yo birthday



We gon' sip Bacardi like it's yo birthday
'Cummy you know we don't give a f*ck
It's NOT your birthday!

Cause You Had a Bad Day, You Had a Bad Day

Where is the moment we needed the most

You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
They tell me your blue skies fade to grey

They tell me your passion's gone away

And I don't need no carryin' on

You stand in the line just to hit a new low

You're faking a smile with the coffee to go

You tell me your life's been way off line

You're falling to pieces everytime

And I don't need no carryin' on

Cause you had a bad day

You're taking one down

You sing a sad song just to turn it around

You say you don't know

You tell me don't lie

You work at a smile

and you go for a ride

You had a bad day

The camera don't lie

You're coming back down

and you really don't mind

You had a bad day

You had a bad day

Will you need a blue sky holiday?

The point is they laugh at what you say

And I don't need no carryin' on

You had a bad day

You're taking one down

You sing a sad song just to turn it around

You say you don't know

You tell me don't lie

You work at a smile

and you go for a ride

You had a bad day

You had a bad day